L.I.F.E :)

The Girl I Used To Be

© Laura

I tell myself that everything's going to be ok,

that there is no reason for all this pain.

The time it took to change, the time it took to

see all those mistakes.

The life I had, I can't have back. The choices I made,

affected me in all those ways.

The mistakes I made have not been forgotten.

The tears I shed, the sounds I made, the feelings 

that left me feeling in a different way.

Yet I can't see why these tears feel so unreal.

I'm not the same, my words are unsaid.

What I hide, is buried deep inside.

To know, to love, to breathe.

It hurts to know that I'll never be the

girl I used to be. The one that would always laugh,

the one that you knew would always be strong.

The feeling is real, the truth is sealed.

I cry in the dark, cause I know I cut too deep.

The blood is like the rain, 

in every way it drifts away.

The scars are real, but the wounds in the heart

are another mark.

If you only knew what I've been through,

or maybe you could take a walk in my shoes.

I'm not fake, I'm not a doll,

I just don't think I'm the same in any way.

So where did my soul go?

Why did I ever let it runaway?

What happened to that girl?

The one that could make you laugh,

the one that would always take you out?

What happened to that girl, 

cause I'm lost without her?

I'm no longer me, the mistakes changed me,

but did they change her?

This poem i got from www. familyfriendspoem.com was definitely relate to me because it reflects to myslef of how I felt these  past few days. This poem is about sadness, pain and unhappiness, just like what I felt right now, I'm in the process of searching things that maybe could help me to surpass everything I've been through and hopefully someday time would heal everything that was been broken by the mistakes and misunderstanding and maybe just maybe the real ME would learn to go back from the days that no one is allowed to feel such pain.

The line or stanza the I like most is the:

The one that could make you laugh,

the one that would always take you out?

What happened to that girl, 

cause I'm lost without her?

I'm no longer me, the mistakes changed me,

but did they change her? 

I know there are times I became so depressed and suddenly sad again, though people around me is trying to say that I'm gonna be okay and always making me laugh, but when I remember the situation I had right now, still I can't help myself to cry and got angry to myself. But I know THE GIRL THAT I USED TO BE will sooner gonna  be fine and when that time comes, hopefully things gonna be alright and things will perfectly fall in my arms with GOD and all the happiest environment is within me.